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Or never bothered to cultivate your sensuality as a woman. Attracting a partner is all about the dance of polarity.

Energy flows between positive and negative electrodes, anode and cathode, magnetic north and south.

Here's the thing: Your romantic success has nothing to do with your mental jewelry and everything to do with how you make the other person feel.

And making someone feel a certain way is a somewhat nonlinear process that requires a different kind of mastery than that of calculus or Shakespeare.

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Now quit thinking you're smarter than the 3 billion base pairs in your genome and 4 billion years of evolution. And if they're going to spend a lot of time with someone, intelligence in a partner is pretty much a requirement. Now, luckily, the world's kinda big, so the remaining 5 percent of the gender of your choice is still a plentiful 160 million or so people.

It's because they've been going at it the wrong way. For most of their lives, smart people inhabit a seemingly-meritocratic universe: If they work hard, they get good results (or, in the case of really smart folks, even if they don't work hard, they still get good results).

Good results mean kudos, strokes, positive reinforcement, respect from peers, love from parents.

From then on, that was your principal identity: The Smart One.

Especially if you had a sibling who was better looking than you, in which case she (or he) was The Pretty One.

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