Either you get complacent because you assume that you’re so far out of your partner’s league that he or she would do anything to jeopardize the relationship – and thus quickly find out just how wrong you are – or you become so convinced that your partner is going to realize that they could do better and drop you like a bad habit that you end up subconsciously pushing them away.Here’s the cold hard truth: if someone is willing to date you – whether you’re a toad and she’s a goddess, or she’s a 5 and you’re a 10 – then league, you need to improve your ability to connect with them emotionally.Pablo Picasso wasn’t anyone’s idea of a male model, and yet he cut quite the swath amongst the young women of Barcelona and Paris, conducting affairs with women a third his age.His passion was addictive; it could carry you away. Maybe it’s the fact that you have so much in common, so many shared hobbies and interests.As a result: when celebrities date other celebrities – again, the people who can most relate to one another via shared lifestyles and commonalities – you end up with pretty people dating older than him.(credit: Debby Wong / Shutterstock.com)" src=" width="359" height="500" srcset=" sizes="(max-width: 359px) 100vw, 359px" / as beautiful or rich or whatever as they are.All the obsessing about “leagues” does is set you up for failure.
We get so hung up on beauty privilege, the halo effect, the value of facial symmetry and waist-to-hip ratios and the idea that only 20% of whomever get 80% of the fucking that we tend to ignore things that don’t fit the accepted narrative.Humans as a rule have a tendency to assume that society is the default paradigm, universally applicable to all cultures and people; Western society holds typically Caucasian features to be the highest standard of beauty, for example, and we have the media hegemony to enforce our beliefs on other cultures through sheer exposure. No matter how much the tabloids may try to convince me that Kim Kardashian is a stunning vision, I wouldn’t fuck her with a borrowed dick and Lexi Belle doing the pushing.Other people are mystified by the appeal of Megan Fox or Anna Paquin or Kerry Washington or Morena Baccarin or Jordana Brewster.Women go gaga for Matt Smith and Arthur Davil and Benedict Cumberbatch..Nobody’s denying that someone who’s conventionally attractive is going to have a leg up on getting a leg over. We don’t just date people’s faces or torsos – not for very long, in any case. Looks, no matter how spectacular, eventually become part of the status quo; as Billy Bob Thornton (no model, he) once said about being married to Angelina Jolie, eventually “it’s like fucking the couch.” Like I said earlier, when we see someone dating somebody who’s supposedly “out of their league”, our default assumption is that it’s that the uglier of the two is rich; Anna-Nicole Smith marrying octogenarian billionaire J.